The saddest moments of my life ..I'll regret all my life.

I am going to be sad all my life. This is because after me and my beloved bro farid won the world selection novice doubles champion , I didnt turn up to the prize giving . I accidentally slept while waiting for him to pick me up . How can this be ? its my first champion trophy.I will be sad and emo all my life for this . But let us look on the bright side .. Maybe my accidental falling asleep moments before the prize giving is a sign from god that there will be more champion trophy partnering bro farid after this . Seriously I am now currently so emo .. Next target ; Vifa Asia novice doubles champion. Come on farid .. Lets do this..
And i just realize that my life had been luckier ever since i met this new friend . Another reason that evokes my anger during the tournament is to see the girl that i use to admire flirting with an asshole.. Its an insult for me but i need to live life with it. Psychologist say pain evokes fear that leades to flight or fight response . Thats how i won the tournament i think . To the asshole ; may you enjoy doing what ever you want with the women i use to like , I'll hate you forever . i Swear by the name of Allah i'll hate you ./.. thanks !!

World selection novice doubles champion

Wow today 28/05/06 will be the most memorable day of my life . Why ? Cause me and my bro farid had become the World selection novice doubles Malaysian champion . I can say that this victory was more for him then for me . Without him I might not win . H e was on fire the whole tournament . I am just sad i was nervous in the finals... Now we r rm500 richer .. Besides that , my mission in foosball is considered a success .. I won my first trophy as a champion and also partnering my bro farid. It had been a dream of mine all this while ..Now we could target for better success in the future. The world tournament ..Come on farid .. Lets start training .. I am seriously sorry for being a last action hero in the finals .. I still wonder how u catch my 'kai' pass.. You are amazing.. Me and you make a good team.. thanks bro .. I'll love you as a bro all my life .. thanks for everything today ..

19/05/06 to the girl that i use to love ; Be happy .. I am out from your life totally.

My birthday party was a disaster. As a conclussion of the bad moments i can conclude that she is finally out from my life . I am totally ready to make her happy . She is finally free from me . I aint no longer knows who she is anymore . The best part is she sent a negotiater to talk to me . I felt insulted . I seriously dont like it .Who the hell she think she is to insult me like that . I honesly will never treat her the same way ever again.I dont think she valued me as a friend . I just wish she will lead her self happily after this. This is because for me she is officially dead . I hope i get to see her in my after life . Dead people is not meant to be in this world dont ya think . For me , let me uphold the perspective that she is officially dead and her death was on 19th of May 2006 . I hope i know where her graveyard is..My sacrifice is just to make her happy .

To the girl who i used to love :

I wish you the best in your life . May god bless you . Thanks for all the sweet moments we had in my life. Partnering you mix doubles ; beating the 2003 nationals champion .That was fun . Besides that , i am going to miss all the random talks we had in your car , in college and in hartamas .The spontaneous ideas such as lets go eat dunkin doughnuts , burger king and many more outings. That was touching. Another thing that i am gonna miss is snapping pictures on my phone with you . All the pictures turns out good . Other sweet touching moments i had with you are disscussion we had on searching past research in a lab report and exams question . I am gonna miss lots more memories with you . In the matter of fact if i list it down it will take forever to finish so i just put few of the memories to be shared in this blog. Last but not least i am seriously gonna miss reloading for you and your sms's. I am gonna miss all these and others . I would like to say please be happy in your life since i am totally out from yours. I believe my sacrifice will make you the happiest person in the world . Be thankful at least for once in your life towards me .

To my bro's farid and daniel :

Thanks for being there for me when i was down . You bro's had made my life worth living . This dota addiction really helps. Without the both of you i wont be standing here today . Thanks for being happy for me .


:::: May her soul rest in peace. Be happy that i am totally out from her life.

I am gonna miss this song .. coz i wont purposely hear it ever again

Song by Joe - No one else comes close


When we turn out the lights
The two of us alone together
Something's just not right
But girl you know that i would never ever let another's touch
Come between the two of us
Cause no one else will ever take your place

Chorus:

No one else comes close to you
No one makes me feel the way you do
You're so special girl to me
And you'll always be eternally
Everytime i hold you near
You always say the words i love to hear
Girl with just a touch,
you can do so much

No one else comes close
And when i wake up to
The touch of your head on my shoulder
You're my dream come true
Oh, girl you know i'll always treasure
Every kiss, every dayI love you girl in every way
And i always will cause in my eyes
Chorus (2x)No one else comes close
No one else comes close

Damn i love you

The end of my life ....

I would like to share my experience in this blog . I would like to officially declare that i will never fall for love ever again . The experience i've been through for the past 2 years had made me suffer too much pain that leads me to the tought of committing suicide..All my life i only love one girl but i got heartbroken because of it. Its either i love her or no one else . Lets say my heart and true love cant win her heart . The best part is she ask me to go fuck off from her life , go study abroad and dont come back . That is so mean .

I am just too sad and depressed . I am sad because i believe that she is worth everything . She is worth the wait . I believe that love develops over time but i can say its total bullshit. I believe that no matter what happened to her in the future , i will still accept her the way she is ..Its true i'll still accept her but right now currently she is the one that cant accept me . Maybe because i treat her like a princess , maybe because i treat her too good . Its true what my friends tells me ' zamir if u want her just be who you are before . I seriously believe she deserves my true love but it looks like it doesnt lead me anywhere . She is the first girl i 've ever have the heart in wanting to be together with her.

She said yesterday that only miracle can make her fall for me . Am i that ugly ? please tell me ... right now i seriously think i do . I fell i've been used . I helped her with all her assignment and purposely dont want to beat her in the current exams . I want her to have the confidence in her college life ... Right now i think its total bullshit .. Is there such thing as miracle ? maybe maybe not .. I just feel i've been used ... All i need now is just physical pain that could divert my emotional pain to physical pain . Right now all i need is alcahol that could makes me high and have memory collapse and forget about her for a bit.. I also need and electro convulsive therapy ( electric shock therapy) that can make me forget her . I just wish i can see her like how my friends view her ; pornstar attraction .

I still love her , i still adore her . i dont know what else to do . Why must i suffer from pain momments 28 hours before i turn 22. Why does she wants to punish me like this . .. why why ?? i am going insane .. i am thinking of suicide .. i dont know what else to do .I seriously thought she was a genuwine friend to me .What type of friend who doesnt know how to repay bet ? what type of friend who loves to see another friend hurt ? I hope she will learn her lesson one day .. May god let miracles that i need to come true ...

Walk with me,
the path of life,
to explore every bend of the road
Enjoy with me the beauty of life,
along its wonderful way
Find comfort with me,
in each other's arms,when grief crosses our path
Find strength with me, in each other's strength,
when despair lies in waitLaugh with me, a single true laugh,
to enlighten another's distress
Cry with me, a single true tear,to understand true happiness
Cherish with me,
the wonders of life,
as they need to be preserved
Rejoice with me,
in the mysteries,of what is yet to be
Find peace with me,
in each other's souls,
when the world has gone insane
Find love with me,
in each other's hearts,
until this life has been fulfilled
And when the path comes to an end
I hope we can say from within
We've known the beauty of true love,
our love came from within

:::::::::::This poem was specially created for her ...

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::FUCK MY LIFE